Best Three Things to Say to People that ask when you’re going to have kids

First let me say, this is a post that might offend some parents and the people that ask this type of question (usually its people that are currently pregnant or have kids already – hence the parents).  It is not my intention to offend at all (however it might happen).  I do apologize to anyone that I offend.

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This is a topic that is a constant annoyance and I wanted to put it out there in the hopes that people will understand just how annoying it is to constantly be asked or have to hear “When are you going to have kids?” or “Are you planning to have kids?” “How long have you been married – oh, no kids yet?” or  “Do you want kids?”  I could go on with all the things I’ve heard.  Honestly this really is the thing that bothers me the most – sure I’m bothered by the lack of a clear vision for climate change or when ‘men’ leave the toilet seat up, but being asked about when I plan to have kids is the highest bother on my list of things that bother me.

I don’t have kids.  Would I like them – YES, more than you can imagine.  Will kids be a possibility for me – NO, I don’t think they will.  That is something that I have to deal with on a daily basis.  It’s painful.  It’s heart wrenching.  I just wished that people would realize that there are so many reasons, many of them personal, as to why people might not have children and that they keep their mouth shut.

 

So in order to minimize my pain, I try and find the humor and think of the greatest things to say to the people that ask me these questions.  It might not be the best way to deal with it but it really shuts up the ‘stupid’ people and their questions.

1.  Kids?  Yikes that would screw with my sex life.  Don’t want to mess with that.

2.  I have kids.  Their names are Penny and Mars.  I have to feed them, walk them and love them.

3.  When world peace has been achieved.

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Best Three Reasons Not to be Polite for a Change

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Thank You (Photo credit: mandiberg)

All of our lives, we are told to be polite.  Drilled into our heads as children that we need to be courteous and polite to others.  Parents use the famous saying of “Don’t forget to say “PLEASE” and “THANK YOU.”  These are values that are ingrained in us and that we carry into adulthood.  Yet along the way, some people forget the basics – they no longer think they need to say please and thank you to others.  It becomes a distant memory in their minds.  They’ve carved out new values and those teachings about being polite fly right out the window.

There are a lot of these people.  I encounter them on a daily basis.  It’s amazing really the amount of people…and that is why I started to think about this topic.  I explored the reasoning behind why I need to be polite.  Sure my parents told me to be but why I’m I still polite.  I’m an adult.  I make my own decisions, I pay bills, I work, and yet I’m always polite.

That is why this post is a departure for me and I’m venturing into new territory – to a place where I advocate reason why you don’t need to be polite.

1.  It gets annoying when you never get a thank you or thanks back for doing something polite

2. People stare at you strangely when you say please and thank you

3.  Its exhausting being so polite

I don’t know how many times I’ve done something nice and polite – open the door for someone; get out of my seat for someone on the bus; let a car in front of me on a jammed-packed road full of traffic…I could go on and on with these examples and I would say about 5% of the time (that is 5% out of 100%) someone will say thank you.

People do stare at you strangely when you say please and thank you.  It seems likes its a crazy foreign language that they have never heard before.  I get this a lot.

Always saying thank you and please is definitely exhausting.  There are a lot of reasons where you need to say it and it just gets to be so tough to keep it up.

All in all, I’m still going to be polite (that is how my parents raised me) and something I believe makes me who I am but sometimes I really like the best three reasons why not to be polite for a change.

Best Three Ways to Thank Your Mom (on Mother’s Day and on all other 364 days of the year)

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The role that a mother can play in her child’s life is tremendous and in honor of it almost being Mother’s Day (May 12), I wanted to devote a post to the most important women in our lives – our mothers.

For those of us that have had a positive influence from our mothers – even in a small way – it has effected us and shaped who we are (even though we may not acknowledge or realize it).  That is why today (even though I’m far away from my own mother) I wanted to share the best three ways to thank your mother and on all other 364 days of the year.

1.  Go and see her – spend time with her…and let her know you love and cherish her

2.  Talk to her (if you are not in the same place) – don’t let your life take over and forget to call – make the time (that is my own personal lesson)

3.  Surprise her with random things (not just gifts) but a walk, going to the movies, going shoe shopping together, visiting a museum etc. – this just let’s her know that you are thinking about her and that you care and enjoy her company!

To all the mother’s out there – Happy Mother’s Day

Best Three Life Tips

There are some things that as a child that your parents don’t tell you (and I can’t blame them) because it seems to be something that you have to experience for yourself.  I’m talking about getting up everyday and going to work.  Having to earn a living.  Having to interact with people that are very different compared to you and how to handle the situations that work throws out to you.  These are the things that you cannot learn from someone but really need to live them and experience them for yourself.

That is why I love to decorate my work space with uplifting life tips (I print mine off from http://www.tipstagram.com/).  When we look at studies on work place stress, the numbers (unfortunately are rising) and that is not good.  Our mental health is as important as our physical health.  Workplaces invest so much money in ensuring they are building a healthy workplace but they forget the mental health piece.   My life tips are around me because when I have a bad day, its easy to sit back in my chair, swirl around and look at those tips.  For some reason, seeing them writen just helps me put things into perspective.  I also even send them to my family, friends and co-workers when I know they are having a bad day. 

1.  It’s OK to make mistakes.

2.  Value the lessons your mistakes teach you.

3. Think positively.

 

It really is ok to make mistakes.  We’re human.  However when you are at work, you don’t always find that same mentally is shared and that is why I have it around me to remind me.  I will make mistakes and that is ok. 

For my second choice, its around those mistakes – learn from them.  That will help you and others around you.  People hate making the same mistake twice and I can completely agree.  We can’t undervalue mistakes.  You make one, now learn from it, move on and do want needs to be done. 

The last life tip is a hard one for me.  Think Positively.  This is something that I struggle with constantly.  I try and try and then try again.  It always seems easier to think negatively than positively but I need to make that change because that change will trickle down and hopefully it will make me a better person.